Politician: Someone who, when they see the light at the end of the tunnel, order more tunnel. --- Sir John Quinton
Political animal: rat, toad, snake, ass, worm, louse, etc.
Socialist: a person who is so disgusted by the way power is controlled by a few huge corporation that he proposes to place it in the hands of one giant corporation.
Dilemma: A politician trying to save both sides of his face at once. -- John Lincoln
Honest Politician: One who, once bought, will stay bought.
It was as dark as the inside of a cabinet minister. -- Joyce Cary
American politicians will do anything for money; English politicians will take the money and won't do anything. -- Stephen Leacock
John Selwyn Gummer, an agriculture minister who makes a sheep look charismatic. -- Mark Lawson
I think we have all enjoyed another lugubrious concatenation of meaningless cliches from the foreign secretary. --- Dennis Healey after a Geoffrey Howe speech.
He looks like a refugee from his sunlamp. --- John Major on Robert Kiroy-Silk
When it comes to the crunch, the Trade Unions will put their arms around Mr Kinnock and say "Neill!" And he will, he will. -- John Major
Why does it take two days for a polaroid of John Major to appear? -- Barry Cryer
Sit down man. You're a bloody tragedy. --- James Maxton during Ramsay MacDonald's last House of Commons speech.
She ate journalists for breakfast and, feeling peckish, bit off some reporters' heads at a press conference. -- Trevor Fishlock on the Iron Lady
I often compare Margaret Thatcher with Florence Nightingale. She stalks through the wards of our hospitals as a lady with a lamp. Unfortunately, it's a blowlamp. --- Denis Healey
If he believes that the spirit of Nye Bevan supports his changes to the NHS then there is a wheel missing from his ouija board. --- Robin Cook
He's going around the country stirring up apathy. --- William Whitelaw
When Carter gave a fireside chat, the fire went out.
I would not want Carter and his men put in charge of snake-control in Ireland. --- Eugene McCarthy
I found out where George Bush is today. He's visiting his economists. He's at Disneyland. -- Lloyd Bentsen
It's a great day for Arkansas. We're on the map at last. Better still, Bill Clinton's not our governor any more. -- anon Arkansas businesswoman
Governor Clinton talks about change, change, change. Well that's all you're going to have in your pockets if he's elected. --- George Bush
We in the Republican party have never said to the press that Clinton's a philandering, pot-smoking draft-dodger. --- Mary Matalin
Q: How do you tell Al Gore from the Secret Service Agents?
A: He's the stiff one!
Governor Martinez exudes the warm personal charm of a millipede. --- Dave Barry
Nixon's motto was: If two wrongs don't make a right, try three. -- Norman Cousins
"I am not going to exploit for political purposes my opponent's youth and inexperience." --- Ronald Reagan during a Presidential debate with Walter Mondale, 1984
You've got to be careful quoting Reagan because when you do it accurately it's called mudslinging --- Walter Mondale [there's a surprise]
The battle for the mind of Ronald Reagan was like trench warfare in World War One; never have so many fought so hard for such barren terrain. --- Peggy Noonan
Malcolm Fraser is the cutlery man of Australia. He was born with a silver spoon in his mouth, speaks with a forked tongue and knifes his colleagues in the back. --- Bob Hawke